My Brother, My Brother And Me

Steel yourselves, dear listeners: This week's episode is MBMBaM's most important show to date. Not only are there an unprecedented number of special, memory-making moments, but there's also some big, big news revealed in the first few minutes. Don't panic! We would never do anything to hurt you, only things to please you, and we can confidently say these changes are made in the service of the latter. Suggested talking points: A Brief Big Bad Beetleborgs Phase, The Muffet, Put a Ring Upon It, Urban Legends, On the Wings of Love, Offworlders, Pay it Inward, Corner-Cut Colonoscopy

We back-ack-ack-ack-ack like a heart attack-ack-ack-ack-ack. We're sorry that we missed last week, but hey, distance makes the heart grow fonder. You want us so bad right now, don't you? Well, then, have us. Suggested talking points: The Gregory Hines Calendar, LUDA, Snorgy, Lovescrooge, Silent Mike/Invisible Darlene, Sleep It, National Bath Safety Month, Pyrokinandre, Tell Me How to Touch You

Between the lack of question submissions, the hurried pace and the general post-Holiday blues, we wouldn't exactly qualify this one as our "best episode." We're not sure we'd qualify it as our "most adequate episode." Is it our "worst episode ever?" That's up to you. "Most disappointing end-of-year episode?" Oh, God yes. Suggested talking points: 95 and Not Alive, Jesus' hat-expanding magic, A wizard of comedy named Patch Adams, metaphorical smudgy sticks, discretion, Kevin James' reversible circumcision

We've got a tight little stocking stuffer for you this week, friends. We're talking about all your different holiday traditions, and we're doing it while trying as hard as we possibly can not to curse. (Except for the first minute or so.) Share it with your loved ones! Thanks to Drew from Toothpaste For Dinner for the fresh intro song. And thanks to JPhonic for the bonus track for premium Appsperience users! And thanks to you, for listening, and being so generally rad. Happy holidays!

Well, you're here, and we're here, so we might as well just do this thing. C'mon. We've only got about 50 minutes to save the world through the power of heartfelt advice, and also the power of saying a bunch of stuff we don't mean.Suggested talking points: Global snow, In Vino Veritas, Still Waters, Fight or Flight, Love Cleanse, Emily Wall Post, Biblebot, The You're Wrong Daily

As the temperature drops, your physiological need for wisdom increases exponentially. That's a scientific fact. Warm up your cold, unenlightened bones with a hot flood of genuine ad-vice, why don't you? It's got the rejuvenating heat of a fresh cup of cocoa, only it won't make your mouth feel all gommy after you drink it.Suggested talking points: Creepin', The Even Longer Con, On the DL, Daily Penis Briefing, Have Mercy, Methspresso, A Bad Scene, Troutleap, Friendtimacy

Justin was inconsiderate enough to be sick during our usual record day, so the episode's late today. Don't be mad at us. Be mad at Justin's wimpy-ass white blood cells. Also, we hope you had a really fantastic Thanksgiving.Suggested talking points: Prius Promise, raw fire, three bowling date rule, penit pills, OG Water, vigilante parking justice, green packaging

You know what? In honor of the holiday that's coming later this week, we're going to use this time to thank you for all the good times you've shared with us over the past seven or so months. You're more than listeners -- you're family. And that means you're invited to the Thanksgiving dinner in our hearts. (But not our houses. Don't be weird.)Suggested talking points: Boyfriend-shaped hole, withering barbs, life begins at stubble, smoochburg, movie terrorists, whippits, teetotaling, the basin

We're celebrating 30 weeks of non-stop advising (except for those two weeks where we stopped) the only way we know how -- by using our hereditary gifts of gab to help guide the world's lost sheep back to the warm stables of wisdom. Also, we learn a little about ourselves along the way. Also, we inadvertently curse like, a lot. We don't know why, but we're sorry.Suggested talking points: Letters from Ho-o-ome, dead talking furniture, family ties, The Babby with the Dragon Tattoo, a new weekly segment, home movies, Jonas Pleasemoney, Patrick Stewart's boner, fursecution, Reggae Rave

Fact: 66.6 percent (repeating) of the brothers McElroy were born on this very day, 30 and 27 years ago. This very special episode is a look back on some of the biggest moments of their lives. By which we mean the biggest events of everyone's lives who sent in questions this week, and also some strangers on Yahoo Answers. By which we mean: A regular show.Suggested talking points: Cat on Lap, Sodoko, Mancoon Buscemi, retail Highlander, world's best lover, (emotional waves), Sexual Edge, Good Sun Setting, eureka

You trying to get your month started off right? We can't think of a better way to do so than to take the next 48 minutes and 13 seconds, and just like, chillax. It's time to coast through the last two months of 2010 on a soothing cloud of brotherly advice.Suggested talking points: The Calm, speed rail lovemaking, cat genitalia-watching, PDA, Lil' Sleepy Jon, pinochle, the Keith Urban series, Bret Michaels' face, the politics of the centipede

In this unofficial MBMBaM Halloween Spooktacular, the brothers McElroy turn up the fright meter to "AAH"-leven, answering a whole mess of eerie queries about ... um, relationships and meeting people and other sad stuff. We guess it's not all that terrifying, unless you consider the fact that we've done this twenty-seven times now to be a little scary. Suggested talking points: The cleanest hands, hypothetical future-to-present time travel, Jekyll and Bastard, Ja Drool, the nerd void, tapeworm baby, baggin' it

The Brothers McElroy have returned to you, dearest listeners, in sickness (Travis and Griffin) and in health (Justin). Through a daze brought along by a poorly thought-out cocktail of coffee and Dayquil, today's episode possesses an entirely unique flavor -- a flavor to savor, if you will.Suggested talking points: Jimmy Facebook, delay of baby, Dr. Money Money, deep heads, in the parker, 14 and loving it, Jesus' battery allergy, brunner

This is a special, special episode, everyone. A very special episode indeed. Not only is it our quarter-of-a-hundred-episode celebration, it's also our first show with the endorsement of world hero, David Hasselhoff. To celebrate, we've got a bunch of free advice, as well as a heartwarming outro from John Palomba. From his guitar, to our hearts, to your ears. Suggested talking points: Wizard Ani, The Hoff, prison pals, the waxening, treeem, insta-baby, mommy's Cosmos, the fightin' Rachel Dratches

It's October, which we all know is the official month of advice, and also pumpkins. Unfortunately, if you've tuned in for a podcast about squash appreciation, you've come to the wrong place. That first thing, though -- that's something we can do something about. Suggested talking points: Oh My Tosh, sexy frumpy dragon, screaming infidelities, baby chain, a torso donation from Kevin Smith, street magic, Mollytalk, coming out

If you're not listening to this new episode at an official, licensed, ordained MBMBaM listening party, then we're not sure you're getting the full listening experience. Advice podcasts are like tandem bikes -- they don't really work unless two or more people sit on them. We don't know what we're saying anymore. Suggested talking points: Wolfwhistles, That full-on Sisqo heat, foreverbaby, Now That's What I Call Music, Eye-spiders, balls and everything, guywriting, monkey stomach, maneater

This week's episode is dedicated to the neverending leadership and heroism exhibited every waking moment by Mr. Matthew McConnaughey. We suggest watching at least two of Mr. McConnaughey's motion pictures as a complimentary experience to this episode. Might we suggest Fools' Gold and Sahara? Or, if you're listening with a loved one, How To Lose a Guy In Ten Days and The Wedding Planner? Suggested talking points: A constant bongo beat, wassassin, the Geordi contingent, big funeral home, Lolito, beer mall, deep cuts in the boneyard, the elegant curvature

Look, there's one of two ways you can respond to our absence over Labor Day weekend: You can get angry, and demand an apology (which we'll happily give) -- but that's kind of a waste of time, isn't it? Let's go with option two, where we run, teary-eyed, into your arms, like prodigal sons returning to their loving fathers. Suggested talking points: The cost of labor, get your poke on, dong gnats, in which we sing Wilson Phillips, gender studies, Travis' nightmare diet, MILK, the WikiAnswers experiment, Super Donuts: A Counterpoint

On this, the twentieth anniversary of our very first collective venture into the terrifying world of podcasting, we bring to you a show that's positively dripping with advice-juice. It's harmless, for the most part, but we wouldn't suggest letting it get on your clothing, or furniture, or your exposed skin. Suggested talking points: Nicknames, a sticky situation, checkerboard leg hair, Tony Toni Tone, the flannel algorithm, apple babies, Swimfan, double deuce

Though some might argue that our past few episodes have suffered from a case of the doldrums, this most totally recentest episode is simply chock-full of action. Seriously. If this episode could somehow become a corporeal thing, it would become Tony Jaa, and it would knee all your questions and dilemmas right in their stupid faces. Suggested talking points: Clean Slate, Don't Let the Joaquins Bite, Black Eyed Prom, Christmas Demands, Google Jones, Too Old For Skinny Jeans, Jimmy Hats, A Movie About a Cafe That Closes, An Answer To Every Question